


Getting Over It『daisuga』

by AspenKai



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Flashbacks, Gay Male Character, Heartbreak, Hook-Up, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Sad Ending, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:06:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26336908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AspenKai/pseuds/AspenKai
Summary: It's two am and I'm coming overGot my heart broke last OctoberReady to get fucked and stare at the ceilingDon't worry, I don't catch feelingsSo why am I smiling on the drive home?Thought I played it cool, thought I was stone coldCan't let you know that I've been thinkin' 'bout youMore than I shouldAnd I know that it's not seriousAnd I got no right to feel like thisIt hurts just a little bit when you leaveAnd next week, you'll be with somebody newAnd I will try to move on tooBut how can I call it thatWhen I was never with you
Relationships: Michimiya Yui/Sawamura Daichi, Sawamura Daichi & Sugawara Koushi, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Kudos: 11





	Getting Over It『daisuga』

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfic is based off Eliza McLamb's song Getting Over It. Please go listen to the song and support the artist!
> 
> Warning: This story has depictions of self-esteem issues, one-night stands, underage sex and profanity.

Suga’s steps echo through the sleeping neighborhood, his phone lighting up his face. Greens and blue shined over his pale skin as texts came through. His eyes checked the time, his teeth gnawing on his soft pink lips. 2:00. A puff of smoke came out of his mouth as he shoved his phone into his back pocket. He looked at the building in front of him, his footsteps slowing down. His eyes scanned his surroundings before heading into the apartment complex. 

Suga stared at the ceiling, his bare chest glowing in the warm light. The light illuminated the red and purple hickeys and bites that covered his torso and neck. He rubbed his hand along a bite on his neck, letting out a prolonged exhale. A man came out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his waist. Suga glanced at the male, his eyes quickly going back to the ceiling.

“That’s quite rude Sugar,” the man cooed, leaning over Suga.

“Don’t talk to me like we are lovers,” Suga huffed. The man chuckled, lifting himself away from Suga’s bare body. 

“Yeah yeah yeah. You’ve told me many times, Sugar.” Suga rolled his eyes, his attention going to his buzzing phone. A name popped up on his phone, causing his eyes to widen.

_ Suga skipped to the volleyball club room. He knew he was early, but he was hoping to get to spend some time with Daichi. For years he had tried to convince himself that he didn’t like Daichi and that he didn’t catch feelings for the brunette. He knew he was bullshitting himself. Whenever Daichi was around his heart would skip a few beats and his stomach would twist itself into knots. He would constantly go out of his way to make time for Daichi. Whenever Daichi called he would stop everything and answer the incoming call.  _

_ As Suga gently pushed the door open, he felt his heart shatter into a million tiny pieces. He knew he had no chance with Daichi, nor did he ever think Daichi was gay but seeing him mid-make-out session with Yui didn’t feel nice. Suga’s pale hands let go of the door, his feet moving on their own accord. Tears stung his gray eyes, a lump forming in his throat. His shoulder bumped into a small figure. _

_ “Sorry,” Suga stammered.  _

_ “Suga?” Nishinoya asked. Suga ignored the concerned multi-color-haired male and kept walking. His mind replayed what he saw in the club room, tears starting to fall. Yui was pressed up against the club room wall, Daichi’s hand in her hair. His other hand on her waist, pulling her closer to him. Their tongues danced together, both panting into the heated kiss.  _

_ “Suga? Why are you crying?” Hinata asked, a worried Kageyama next to him. Suga shook his head, his legs beginning to sprint away from the school. His tears fell to the beat of his broken heart, his steps matching the pace.  _

Suga hit the green ‘answer’ button, a gruff voice booming from the other side of the phone. 

“Where are you?” Suga let out a huff, his eyes rolling at the brunette's concern.

“Enjoying myself,” Suga responded. The other side of the call went quiet, awkward silence filling the room.

“Hey Sugar, I'm going to the supermarket. Want anything?” The male asked, now fully clothed. Suga shook his head, a blush taking over his pale face.

“Suga who the fuck is that!”   
“No one.”

“Where the fuck are you!”

“Daichi ple-”   
“Where the fuck are you Koshi!” Suga flinched at the use of his first name. It wasn’t uncommon for Daichi to use his first name, it just caught him by surprise. Suga quickly sent Daichi his current address, a sigh escaping his lips.

“Happy now?” Suga said, sarcasm dripping off the two words.

“I'm coming to pick you up.”

“Wha-”

“I’ll be there in five minutes.” The call ended leaving Suga speechless. He quickly went to his hookups closet, grabbing an oversized turtleneck and some jeans he had leftover from their last hookup. He hopped in the shower, trying his best to make it look like he didn’t just get fucked. He heard a knock, fear tugging on his heart. He wrote a quick note before getting the door. Daichi stood on the other side of the door, a tired expression on his face.

“H-Hey,” Suga stuttered. Daichi looked around the room before grabbing Suga’s wrist. Suga gasped, letting Daichi practically drag him to his car. Suga got in his car, watching Daichi place his head and hands-on the wheel.

“Daichi?”

“What were you doing here Suga?” Suga bites his lip, blood gently pooling around his canines. Daichi lifted his head, staring at the nervous Suga. Suga felt Daichi’s eyes on him, swallowing blood from his lips. Daichi reaches out, gently tugging on Suga’s lip.

“Don’t do that Koshi. You’re bleeding,” Daichi said. Suga felt his ears and cheeks heat up, a blush reddening his face. 

“I’ve be...been-,” Suga choked out. Daichi’s hand dropped from Suga’s face. Tears fell from Suga’s eyes. He wasn’t sad or mad, rather he was embarrassed. Suga’s hands rushed to push the tears off his cheeks but they were stopped by Daichi’s hands.

“Koshi,” Daichi whispered. The car was silent, except for Suga’s sobbing.

“Koshi, look at me,” Daichi pleaded. Suga looked over at Daichi, who held a soft expression on his face. 

“It’s okay. I don’t know what you’re going through or what’s happening. Just...please don’t cry. You know I hate seeing you crying” Suga felt more tears fall as Daichi pulled him into a gentle embrace. Suga cried into the hug, his hands grabbing onto Daichi’s shirt.

_ Suga rested his head on the window seal of the car, a smile on his face.  _

_ “What are you smiling about dork?” Daichi asked. Suga looked over at him, softly giggling. _

_ “It’s just..” Suga stopped his sentence. He couldn’t let Daichi know that he’s been thinking about him for days. Maybe even longer, maybe weeks. _

_ “Suga?” Daichi had been rather distant from Suga recently. Every night Suga would cry, maybe he did something wrong. Maybe he had hurt Daichi, who was now suffering in silence.  _

_ “I’ve just been looking forward to hanging out with you!” Daichi smiled, Suga’s heart fluttering. _

_ “Me too! You’ve seemed distant lately and I thought you would bail.” Suga scoffed. Sure he had been avoiding Daichi, but it wasn’t cause he didn’t want to hang out with him. Rather he couldn’t get the thought of Daichi and Yui making-out in the club room, out of his head. Every second of every day, all he could think about was their kiss. It hurt him more than it should, he knew that. Daichi wasn’t gay, he wasn’t in love with Suga. Suga knew that. For heaven’s sake, he had been telling himself that for the last two years! _

_ “You know I can’t live without you, idiot!” Suga said lightly punching Daichi. Sure he had been giving him the cold shoulder, but he thought he played it off that he was busy. _

_ “I’ve just been busy,” Suga said, rubbing his arm. _

_ “I know, I just missed you that’s all,” Daichi said, turning to Suga with a bright smile. Suga turned bright red, his eyes focused on Daichi. _

_ “Keep your eyes on the road, Sawamura.” _

The car slowly pulled into Daichi’s driveway, Suga fidgeting with his hands. Daichi got out of his car, his hands stretching above his head. Suga took the opportunity to stare at the male’s muscular arms and back. Every muscle on Daichi’s body seemed extra defined to Suga, his face burning. Daichi turned back to the male with white hair, a soft smile playing on his lips.

“You coming? Or are you going to keep staring at me?” Daichi joked. Suga practically jumped out of his skin, hurriedly getting out of the car.

“Why would I be staring at you?”

“Because you’re in love with me,” Daichi said. Suga’s eyes went wide, fear twisting his stomach. Daichi walked into his house, holding the door for the nervous male.

“In love… with you? I have so many better options!” Daichi gasped, Suga nervously swallowing. Daichi giggled, a smirk glaring Suga down.

“Like who? Noya? Asahi?”

“Think bigger!”

“Tsukishima?”

“No! Someone like Kuroo or Iwaizumi!” Suga could swear for a moment he saw Daichi’s smile falter. He knew he was imagining it because he wanted to pretend Daichi liked him back, but oh god did he wish his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him.

“Yeah like they would want you,” Daichi said, heading into his room. Suga felt his stomach sink, the urge to cry overtaking him. He knew that Daichi was just kidding. Of course, he was just kidding. Just kidding. It was just a joke. Right?

“You coming?” Suga blinked back his tears, nodding his head.

**A white-haired male’s headshot back, his laugh filling up the room. Daichi stared at him, his eyes almost longingly looking at the male in front of him. Suga looked at his crush, his head tilting to the side.**

**“What?” Suga asked. Daichi hummed back. Suga placed his hands on Daichi’s knees, leaning toward the dark-haired male.**

**“Sawamura?” Daichi’s face went red, his eyes scanning over Suga’s lips. He pulled Suga’s hands off his knees, letting them fall on his abdomen.**

**“You have a nice laugh, Sugawara.” Suga’s face turned bright red, his gray eyes shining brighter than the moon. Daichi’s hand went to Suga’s lips, Suga’s hands gently gripped Daichi’s shirt. Daichi pulled Suga’s face closer, the boy’s inches away from kissing. Daichi let go of Suga’s lip, his hand traveling to Suga’s chin.**

**“Sawamura,” Suga breathlessly said. Daichi pulled their faces closer, the space between them closing.**

Suga stretched his body, dragging the sleepiness out of him. He had always been an early riser, unlike Daichi, so he was surprised to see the burnett leaving the room. He quickly retracted his hand that wanted to reach out for Daichi. His stomach twisted, not with love or admiration, rather with sadness and fear. 

“Where are you going?” Suga breathed out. Daichi turned to him, his face reddening.

“Yui wanted to meet up at the park.”

“Oh.” Daichi walked to the door, stopping right before he exited.

“I left out some clothes for you, some of them are Yui’s but I think they should fit.” Suga’s face flushed, his heart beating in a happy rhythm.

“Thanks.”

“Also, I had this really…,” Daichi trailed off. Suga tilted his head, blinking three or four times in confusion.

“Remind me to tell you about my dream on Monday,” and with that Daichi left the room. Suga felt his stomach drop. He had no right to feel the way he did. Daichi very clearly wasn’t into guys and even if he was, he would never be into Suga. They would never be anything but friends, they would never be lovers. They would never hold each other in the quiet of the night. They would never dance with each other the way lovers do. They would never tell each other sweet nothings. They would never cook together while waiting for their children to wake up. They will never get to be star-crossed-lovers. 

Suga walked to school, wearing the clothes Daichi let him borrow. The shirt was far too big for him, it very clearly being Daichi’s and not his. The pants were some type of leggings, which surprisingly fit Suga perfectly. He walked at a slow pace, his footsteps causing a sad beat. He quietly walked to the gym, his eyes widening at the sight before him. Daichi was standing in the room with Yui’s hand intertwined with his.

“Everyone meet Yui Michimiya, my girlfriend!” Daichi’s smile hit Suga in the stomach, like the way the iceberg hit the titanic. Suga felt an ocean of tears swell up inside of him, his legs rushing him away from the cause of his pain. He ran until his legs burned and his breath was shallow.

_ Suga stared at his ceiling, tears staining his face. Daichi’s contact number was pulled up on his phone, the text messages shining blue and green. Suga breathed out a shaky breath, his mind flooded with thoughts. After seeing Daichi and Yui kissing, he knew Daichi had feelings for the girl. He knew Daichi wasn’t in love with him but oh god did it hurt. _

__ _ “I’m done,” Suga choked out. He had to stop being in unrequited love. He didn’t know how much more his fragile heart could take. He was never one to quit, even if there was no point to keep on. Suga had always been so determined and hardworking that the idea of quitting just wasn’t him. He knew being in love with Daichi was a dangerous game, and that no matter what he did his heart will be shattered in the end. He didn't need anyone to tell him that being in love with a guy who doesn’t love guys was a bad idea. So he quit. Right then and there he decided to quit. He knew he wouldn’t be able to stop loving his best friend, but did he tell himself he would.  _

__ “SUGAWARA!” Noya screamed. Suga jumped out of his memory, his eyes wider than dinner plates.

“N-Noya,” Suga stuttered out, his tears falling onto the sidewalk. The small male dropped to his knees, his arms wrapping around the gray-haired male. Suga dropped his head into Noya’s shoulder, tears falling on their own.

“I’m sorry,” Noya said. 

Both boys sat in silence, Suga crying into Noya’s small frame. Noya’s shirt wrinkled as Suga gently grabbed onto it.

“I-I don’t get it. Why did I-I deserve this? What d-did I do to deserve t-this? All I ever w-wanted was love. I never a-asked for a-anything else. I just wanted Dai-” Suga choked on the brunette’s name, Noya tightening the hug.

“I just wanted him to l-love me, Noya. That’s all I-I ever wanted.”

**Author's Note:**

> Before I leave you, I just wanted to say not every story has a happy ending! Sometime while writing this I decided that this isn’t the type of story that ends with a kiss. Rather, this is a story that ends in heartbreak and tears! I hoped you enjoyed the story and that I didn’t hurt your feeling to much!
> 
> word count: 2,331  
> finished: 9/5/2020[21:08]  
> edited: 9/6/2020[10:54]  
> posted: 9/7/2020[1:31]


End file.
